Saturday, March 17, 2012

*Degree Pedigree*

It has been two weeks since I started out my degree study. Hell. I felt like shit. Having to be robbed of my holiday routines, now I really missed out my homey chores. I miss my dad's sarcasm, my sister's nagging, my cats and dogs, and surely I'm missing my freedom to cook and eat my favorite meals. Owh... I missed all of that. I haven't met with my lil sis and my lil bro since last year and somehow, I begin to fear that I might not be able to hang out with them like before. Kids grow up too fast theses days.

For certain reasons that I couldn't explain, I have a fear that gripping me so tight. To die without accomplishing my dream is one of my worst fear. If possible, I want to have at least a child before that time come. To leave without leaving anything is one unbearable thought you know. I'm not saying that I wish or wanted to die, but, yo know, I worry things too soon and too much.

As for my study at the time being, actually I can say its pretty good. The only problem is me. I seems haven't been able to accept reality. I still need time. Homey blues. I hate it. XD

See that title of this post? I put it up because I like the rhyme. That's the only reason. Okay? Don't misunderstand me yea?

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Migrainica Weekatus

Migrainica Weekatus. Migraine infested week.
I started this week with nervousness and a bit of sadness.
I left my safe haven and made my way here to suffer again. The bad thing is that my heart still in holiday mode and i'm really reluctant to accept the reality that I now am having myself going through days of stress and panic and misery.
I look at my timetable and i frown and sigh unconsciously.
Who would have thought that we got to take intersession for two papers this semester's holiday? I calculated the cost of money and holiday. Whoa...600 to spend for that and I'll be left with less than two weeks of holiday before i start my fourth semester study.
Awesome! I might grow myself white hair and wrinkles all over my face.

Hell. Come what may. I'll be standing in the end. Heheh.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

MARCHing FORward EVERyday

March came. Today my brother's birthday. Now in my family we got birthdays of 1 jan, 2 feb, and 3 march.

This morning I woke up, I still feel sick and my throat sores. I got quite terrible blues too because I'm missing my home. Now here at hostel, I'm currently holding refugee status. I was staying illegally in one of my fren's room and i'm waiting for Monday to see whether i'll be getting me-self a nice clean room or not.
Oh I just can't wait to see monday.

I gotta admit, sometimes, we will have to face the reality that we somehow did get the best of the best but we let it go. Now that I felt like that, I can't go back to the point before because it already has vanished. Now what I can do is always the same thing I did. I'm marching forward. Everyday the same thing.
I don't gold it against anybody. I'm cool bout it.

5th March. I'm waiting for that day. I can't wait to see who will be my mates for this 2 year ride of pain, stress, sadness, and enjoyment. I know some of 'em but who will be the new addition. They'll be cool or not with us? Will they be ready for me?

Anyway, I'll leave that for Monday. HEHEHEHEHE